what was bliss has gone amiss

May 6, 2008

Where is God when the world is ablaze?  Why did the Devil discard his angelic grace?  Why are people always bound in some craze?  What ever happened to this forsaken place?  This sacred race with a human face.

In our hands, our furred, finned and feathered friends meet their ends.  We don’t think we need to make amends, but that all depends on current social trends indicating that before something breaks, it bends.

We don’t like to think a thought about more than we think we’ve got.  The memory is out there, but it looks like we all forgot that a lazy person can’t be taught.  If you can’t beat them.  Greet them, but don’t get caught.

The One & Only Multiverse (Infinite Big Bangs)

February 2, 2008

 I have learned to hear about things of a cosmological, astrological, quantum nature.  I have learned that I will never truly understand what physicists are talking about, even when they are speaking ‘common tongue’.  For instance, take the neutrino.  When the neutrino was confined to mathematical equations and not the observable Universe, it had two suspicious properties.  First, it was massless.  Second, it was moving at the speed of light and, therefore had no internal clock (not subject to time).  If something is without mass and moving at the speed of light (one is a condition of the other), then it cannot be detected by anything we know.

Scientists figured they could detect (and prove the existence of) the neutrino by proxy.  The neutrino was thought to interact with certain other nuclei, knocking electrons out of them (or something like that) in wild, random collisions.  An experiment was set up to test this theory & boom…the collision anticipated by mathematics occurred.  Now the neutrino ventures into the reality of quantum physics (it was observed!).  This happened something like 40 years ago.

Here’s what I don’t understand.  How does something without mass interact with and affect something with mass?  It doesn’t make sense.  If I throw nothing at something, then I cannot expect something to be affected.  However, the massless neutrino – somehow defying the laws of physics – could.  It has since been proven that the neutrino does, in fact, have a mass (& is not moving at the speed of light), but it took years for this to be understood.

Another thing, our Universe might only be one of an infinite number Universes, each with it’s own unique set of physical laws (properties).  I shouldn’t have to say, but we’re only familiar with our own Universe.  Regardless, there’s a theoretical probability that there is another Universe in which you have blue hair or another in which you don’t exist at all.  There’s a Universe where Elvis is alive and well, Jimmy Hoffa is a day care specialist, and everyone has legs for arms and arms for legs.  There could be a Universe identical to ours in every way, except it’s five minutes ahead.  Anything you can think of is possible.

In theory then, all these self-contained Universes are floating around somewhere, I am not precisely sure where.  It is probable that there are sometimes collisions between two (or more) Universes, which could, to an extent, explain the Big Bang from our perspective.  However, with an infinite number of Universes, it is possible there are an infinite number of collisions, which equates to an infinite number of Big Bangs – just not all in our particular Universe (membrane).

Is there any observable interaction between Universes?  I don’t know, but let’s think for a moment.  What about ghosts and other phenomena we refer to as supernatural?  Could these be trace elements of another Universe (or dimension)?  Maybe.

I mention dimensions.  We’re familiar with the first three – height, width, depth.  The fourth dimension is time.  The first three dimensions move fluidly through the fourth.  Nothing is ever the same in four dimensions, one point will ALWAYS change (typically time).  I don’t know anything about dimensions 5 through 11, except that our Universe doesn’t really make much sense unless they are included.

For instance, gravity as a force in four dimensional space is very weak, comparatively speaking.  You can defy gravity with a fridge magnet.  We are pulled by the full force of the Earth, yet can lift small and large objects alike.  Why is gravity so weak?  Well, it turns out there’s a possibility that gravity (as we know it) is only the remnants of that which bled through from the 11th dimension.  Meaning, gravity might originate in the 11th dimension & some of it’s force ‘leaks’ into and affects our reality.

Oh…and the 11th dimension is extremely thin, but infinitely long.  Even stranger, the 11th dimension is closer to pretty much everything in this dimension than anything else in this dimension.  Does that make sense?  It is less than 10 to the power of -20 micrometers away.  The 11th dimension is closer to you than the clothes you’re wearing.

What strange place do we inhabit?!

Once I had a bunch of moral fibre (but it went through my system pretty quick)

November 7, 2007

I don’t know the first thing about seconds.  The truth of the matter is I like throwing Frisbees to myself.  I love the dignity of the parabola.  The golden equation, the sum.  Some is too much.  Chocolate smiles too sweet to smudge with a touch.  Lick it, lump it, like it.  When did fudge become a mistake to make?  I rub my eyes full of glittering flies.  Blue.  Electric.  Eclectic, almost like electric if you don’t pay attention.  I’d be surprised if most people’s attention could span a puddle. 

We’re getting Googlephrenic.  The idea of disgoogleplexia is heightened by infinity plus one.  The numbers never end.  There is nothing but empty space.

I wonder if they’ll ever have McDonald’s Restaurant theme parks for all the little chubby kids.  Eat your shorts for good, nutritional Christian values.  It’s not supposed to make scents, but it stinks no matter how you slice it.  I recommend using your hands and ripping, but that doesn’t always work out for some of the saucier things in life. 

What can you do about googlephrenia?  I don’t know, Google it.  The spinning wheel, karmic in nature, stops on a dollar.  Bits of a puzzle up the barkers sleeve.  Religion is so medieval.  Shit.  Think of something else.   You know what I meme? 

Know, no, I mean, now, how brown cow?  If they made chocolate milk, I’d be sucking those teats ’til the farmers came home.  I don’t want to offend Hindus.  I rather like the art.  Beautiful intricate colours.  I don’t know anything about famine, except for the guilt I feel from cheating on the thirty-hour version.  Fuckin’ charity, what is it these days?  A corporation under a different guise. 

Shit stinks.  I think that’s why we call it shit.  We say so many things smell like shit, but they don’t really all smell exactly like shit, not even all shit smells the same.  That would be weird.  What would the world be like if we spoke with our mouths, but ate with our bums?  The food court would be a lot uglier. 

What does crude mean to you?  What does rude have to do with crude, other than the price we pay?  I’m on a plane, wake up snickers, I have a sweet suite to suit all my wants, but none of my needs.  All these weeds.  How is cleanliness close to godliness?  Priorities ward back, beckon thee to reckon thee. 

A yahoo is a beast of burden, a human slave to horses.  Is this what you want?  Horses are fleet of foot.  We’d be too, if we stayed on all fours.  That would be strange, huh?  Quadrupeds, eating out of our asses.  At least there’d be some time when we weren’t talking out of them.  Too many people talk shit.  Not a bad breath statement.  I might have something to say about that, but I locked all the workers out of my olfactory.  Commie bastards.  None of them can play the drums worth a ruble. 

America is going down with their dollar and sense.  If life without a gun in my face means death, then death it is, ’cause you can’t control anyone or anything for long.  If I’m going down because of you, I’m taking you too.  Ya dig? 

I once had a nightmare about digging holes.  Each hole was assigned an numeric value, more like an algebraic equation.  The nightmarish was that no matter how many holes I dug, I couldn’t surpass a certain sum.  I woke up sweaty and terrified.  I didn’t sleep for the rest of the night.  2001 was on TV.  I should give that movie another shot.  I was in a poor frame of mind.  I shouldn’t live with regret, but that would mean I’d have to forget.  What?  Not sure.  No matter how much I forget, it never changes the regret.  Some things are carved into bone. 

Once I had a whole bunch of moral fibre, but it went through my system pretty quick.  That’s the title.  That’s how things are named in these here parts.

Funny thing is I don’t know what’s mine and what belongs to someone else.  I don’t know if plagiarism applies to a memory without footnotes, end notes, ibids or et als.  We’re all crazy.  We can’t agree on cake.  I like the icing that gives you a cocaine like sugar high.  You know the icing in which you can crunch the granules of sugar.  Still mostly empty space.  Hard to picture.  Harder to imagine.

All apologies and a thousand more, but I’m still going to slam the door.  I don’t want to see you anymore.  You’re a whole other whore.  None of this real.  Nothing I feel.  The opposite of love is indifference and I am finally indifferent.  It doesn’t matter, because matter is mostly empty space, like an excuse.  No substance other than forgetting.  I’ve lost count of the leaves in the trees, but the planes are lining up ninety seconds apart on the skyway.  Nothing is forever, not even energy as we know it. 

The truth of the matter is that I like white chocolate cake with my name scrawled in sweet icing sugar.  I have a big belly.  So there we are…word count 856.  666+190.  I wonder what the six-hundredth and sixty-sixth word was?  I should’ve paid attention.  My attention span is a short toothpick bridge.  Everything is a joke, especially this, that and the other thing, like an algebraic equation for holes, the variables are yours to tell.

The Downside of Balconies

September 16, 2007

I live in an apartment building.  It’s nice, quiet & there aren’t too many bad apples in the building.  Well, except for the people who live above us.  They sweep their balcony over the edge and onto ours!  At some point in the summer, either a dog or a human urinated over the edge, stinking up and staining part of our balcony.  But the event that broke my silence was about a week ago.

I woke up and went outside for my coffee and cigarette.  After a few minutes, I realize that I am almost resting my elbow in some orange gunk.  It was kind of like carrot soup.

Someone had vomitted over the edge.  I was on the verge of doing so myself!  I fancy myself logical and deductive.  I examined the dispersal of the ‘vomit splatter’.  Our balcony had one concentrated spot.  The balcony below had two, but close together.  The balcony beneath that one had two – these ones spread out even further.  And so on.  I think four balconies were affected.  None of them had the one concentrated spot.  It must’ve come from the balcony directly above.

Further to this – they had a mop resting over their railing for the better part of a week afterwards.  Someone cleaned up a mess up there!

Since then, they have not apologized.  They have not offered to clean up the mess.  Nothing.  I find that very rude.

I offer the following picture as proof that this is a true story.  Beware…this is a picture of vomit.


A lot in life and parking.

June 3, 2007

I had a guy groove me at a stop sign when it was my turn to go.  “That prick cut me off!”  Then he pulled into the same plaza I was going to and nearly hit two pedestrians.  We parked pretty much face to face in the parking lot.  He got out of his car in a hurry and walked briskly to the door, almost as if he had to beat me there.  I didn’t really give a shit, but I was a little upset about being grooved at that stop sign, not to mention his carelessness with the pedestrians.  “Big friggin’ hurry!” 

I strolled along.  He got inside the Dominion, then dilly-dallied around the entrance and became an intrusion in my path.  He proceeded to walk slowly and in such a way that made it difficult for me to get past him.  That was a little weird, I thought this guy was in a rush.  I finally squeezed by and went down the coffee aisle.  He stood at the end of the aisle and watched me for a bit, then moved on.  I grabbed the coffee and a few other things.  I was in there for about ten minutes.  I lined up in the express lane, which is closest checkout lane to the exit.  Little note, I had precisely eight items. 

Anyways, the lineup took about five minutes.  I step up to the cashier and in my periphery I see this friggin’ guy lingering about.  He doesn’t have anything in his hands!  He’s been there for fifteen minutes, was in a big enough rush to get there that he cut me off and nearly hit two people and he hasn’t got a single thing in his hands.  He’s there for no apparent reason.  I pay for my goods, grab my bags and head for the exit.  Guess who’s walking right in front of me in such a way as to make it difficult for me to pass?  It was almost as if he was waiting for me to finish at the checkout before he decided to leave. 

We finally emerge into the parking lot where I can hustle past him.  He starts walking faster like it’s a race to the cars.  By now I’m thinking, “Screw you buddy!  I’m beating you out of this parking lot.”  I boogie to my car, open the door, fire the bags onto the passenger seat, jam the key into the ignition, press the clutch, fire it up, throw it into first and fly.  I didn’t beat him to his car, but I did beat him out of the parking lot. 

This does not, however, explain what the hell that guy was doing in the first place.  There are only two things I can think of.  He could’ve escaped from an institution of a mental health orientation.  Or he’s just some guy who gets beat up by life every day and does these small things to get even and noticed all at once.  Either way, buddy was messed up.  Quite possibly one of the most irritating human beings I have encountered but never had the pleasure of speaking to.  He inspired such negative feelings in me from that one action at the stop sign and everything about him became the epitome of irritation.  He pushed all the wrong buttons in me and I wanted to pummel him.  I exercised restraint. 

What the hell was he doing?  Why was he at Dominion when he didn’t need anything?  Why was he in a hurry at some points and not at others?  For instance, he stood looking at the 25 cent candy machines by the exit for a couple of minutes before I completed my transaction.  I don’t understand.  Could it all be a figment of my imagination?  Was he there at all?  Maybe he didn’t cut me off.  Maybe he didn’t nearly hit those pedestrians.  I could’ve been in an agitated or irritated state and manifested him from the depths of my frustrations.  It’s quite possible I’m the one who escaped from the asylum,stopped taking my meds and have become a menace.  Shit, what if I cut him off?  Are there people looking for me now?  Trying to return me to the general safety of a padded cell.  Are you reading this?  Am I writing with my mind or my fingers?

Nothing is real.  When am I?

Truth – Stranger than Fiction

March 10, 2007

This article was posted to SouthBendTribune.com on Feb. 20, 2007.

Brothers killed in collision with each other

Authorities say it’s a coincidence Decatur men’s automobiles hit head-on.

Tribune Staff Writer

PAW PAW — Two brothers from Decatur were killed Sunday when their autos collided near Paw Paw, police reported.

Investigation was continuing Monday, but officers with the Van Buren County Sheriff’s Department said it appeared to be a coincidence that the autos driven by James West, 33, and Jessie West, 24, collided head-on in the 70000 block of 39th Street in Paw Paw Township.

Not only were the victims brothers, but they lived together in Decatur, police said.

Sgt. Virg Franks said interviews with family members, friends and co-workers of the West brothers left a strong impression that the two got along well and would not have intentionally committed such an act.

Based on those interviews, Franks said police also ruled out a game of “chicken,” in which motorists drive toward one another to see who veers away first.

“That would have been completely out of character,” Franks said. “There was no evidence that contributed to the crash.”

Officers reported that James West was driving north on 39th Street about 3:15 p.m. when he lost control on the snow-covered road. The auto crossed the center line and traveled into the path of Jessie West’s oncoming vehicle, police said.

Franks said it appeared from the scene the right tires on James West’s vehicle dropped off the paved portion of the road, causing his auto to skid into his brother’s lane of traffic. Snow perhaps contributed to the car traveling off the pavement, Franks said.

He said Jessie West apparently was driving home after completing his shift at a restaurant in the village of Paw Paw, Franks said. He said he was unaware where James West was headed.

James West was ejected from his auto and was lying on the road when officers arrived. Jessie West was pinned in the wreckage of his car and had to be extricated by rescue workers using hydraulic equipment, police said.

Officers said both were dead at the scene. Neither was wearing a seat belt, police said.  [Note from host of this web log: see comment below regarding the validity of the statement regarding seatbelts.]

Although authorities have yet to determine if drugs or alcohol were factors in the crash, Franks said he didn’t notice the odor of alcohol or containers of alcohol in either vehicle.

He said the accident was one of the most tragic his department has investigated.